Make A Child Smile

John's Story
written by mom Lorraine

My son John was born on January 26th, 1995. He was a much loved and awaited baby - his older brother Nick had been praying for a brother since he was 3 and our John was born 2 weeks before Nick's 6th birthday. John's sisters were 7 and 4 and a half at the time, and they loved him so much - he was like a living baby doll to them. John weighted 9 lbs 4 oz at birth and was 26 inches long!

He appeared to be a strong healthy baby, but it was soon apparent that he had asthma like his older sister and brother did. We spent many nights at the ER, and then it was discovered that John had a dust mite allergy. After one bad attack, he was given a nebulizer, put on Singulair, and his asthma was finally under control. We thought that the worst was behind us, sadly we were to find out later that it was not.

John attended 3 and 4 year old preschool, kindergarten and first grade. He was a happy child and we all spoiled him! At the end of kindergarten I filmed John singing his graduation songs! One of them was called First Grade, First Grade, it was sung to the tune of New York, New York. I remember his sweet voice, John loved to sing "First Grade, First Grade, I'm coming your way, I want to be a part of you, First Grade....". Little did we know what first grade held for him.

John was always a religious child, very close to God, he had been consecrated to God our father, through the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary as soon as I knew that I was pregnant with him. He was my miracle child, my one in a million chance of ever conceiving again. John was consecrated to God our Father again on his baptism day, February 12th, 1995, when he was 17 days old. I always knew he would suffer in this life, I just didn't know it would begin so young.

I remember getting a call from his kindergarten teacher, she asked the children if they knew what angels were, she was astonished when John told her they were Spiritual Beings created by God to help and guide us, and he told her the names of the 9 choirs of angels - Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones, Dominions, Powers, Virtues, Principalities, Archangels and Guardian Angels!

By the time John turned 7, in first grade, he was 4', 4'' tall, all the other children were so much smaller than him. Shortly after John turned 7, he started getting ill, leg pains, daily fever and headaches. For 6 weeks I took him to the doctors and they kept telling me if was the flu, when I said that he had all the symptoms of Leukemia the doctor lifted up his shirt and said there wasn't a bruise on him, I was just a paranoid mother.

After 2 weeks, at about our 16th doctor visit, they were pretty fed up with me and his PCP said there was nothing wrong with him. He washed his hands and was about to leave the room and I blocked the door. I told him I knew there was something wrong with John. The PCP finally did a finger pinch to check his red count and came back in and told me to take John straight to the hospital. I asked why and he said his red count was 4. I knew at that moment that he did have Leukemia.

John had been in t-ball since he was 3, and in Scouts since 5. On May 3rd 2002, he became a tiger scout. On May 4th 2002 he played his first game as a little league player. On May 6th, 2002 when he should have been singing at his spring musical, but he was in the ER getting 3 transfusions. I will never forget what he said - first, "I can't believe this is happening to me" and then "God please save a lot of souls through this pain". John's heart was enlarged and his organs were failing. Had I put him to bed that night he would have gone to Heaven in his sleep.

On May 8th, his sister Joan's 12th birthday, John was officially diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. He was given a 70% chance of long term survival because he was diagnosed so late. He was homebound tutored through the second grade to give him a better chance of survival.

As soon as he was strong enough to walk, we got permission for him to make his Holy Communion, also the bishop gave permission for john to make his confirmation in March 2003 along with his older brother Nick. As it turned out, John was confirmed before Nick, because he had been in the hospital on March 3rd and the bishop came to the hospital and confirmed John, then went to the church and confirmed the 8th graders. I missed seeing Nick being confirmed.

John has many emotional problems and is in counseling. He has transferred his fear of cancer to stickers, he crossed over into boy scouts and he will not return, he will not play baseball. To John those are all things associated with cancer. John is now in 6th grade, and 3 weeks ago his old symptoms started. If John is relapsing, he has a 30% chance of survival. Please keep him in your prayers. John's sister Faith, is now a college freshman, John's brother Nick is graduating HS this coming Spring, and Joan the following Spring. Please pray for strength for our family and to accept God's will in all things.